There are some things that humanity would be better off without. Many of these things we brought upon ourselves, by foolishly inventing them and, quite often, continuing to produce them with abandon. Some of these inventions are old, and others are startlingly new. It goes to show what we have (or have not) learned over the years. But this list is not exhaustive. We have made far more mistakes than this. What did we miss? What do you think?
The Selfie Stick
This is truly upsetting. The Selfie Stick makes us look like total idiots. I remember the first time I saw one. I blinked. I blinked again. I pinched myself. This can’t be real. But it is. Narcissism has never been so easy.
Crocs
Not for a minute can this fashion misstep be forgiven. And don’t justify your foolishness with excuses about comfort or utility. Crocs are the bane of modern footwear, and no one wants to hear otherwise.
Spam
Not many people know what Spam actually tastes like, and for good reason. Spam is basically nuclear end-times food – you store it up in your bomb shelter because only in an apocalyptic future is the consumption of it acceptable.
Flowbee
This is one of those As Seen On TV pieces of junk that should have never been invented. No self-respecting kid should be brought up to believe that the Flowbee haircut looks like a normal haircut. Kid, your mom is just trying to save a penny.
The 24 Hour News Cycle
The news used to happen once or twice a day. And that sufficed. Now the cycle simply never ends. All news, all the time. And at what cost? Our sanity. To fill up the empty hours, you can now find news stories about cats stuck in trees and kids that wet their pants. It is a desperate situation. And when it’s not petty happenings, it’s little more than reality TV.
Cloning
The technology to clone is very scary. And we do have the technology. Now it’s only a matter of time until we’re cloning ourselves and then it will get pretty weird.
High Heels
This seems like an unnecessary extreme of discomfort to go to just to show that you care.
Fast Food
Rumor has it that fast food chains are beginning to provide healthier options these days. I doubt it.
Styrofoam
Do you realize that this synthetic product never goes away? We should never have done this to ourselves. Oh wait, it’s still happening.
Clip On Tie
Look, if you’re a guy, you need to learn how to tie a tie. This is dangerously tacky and could cost you a big loss of others’ respect. Not that that should really matter…alright, go ahead and keep on clippin’ on.
Farmville
Come on, this is a serious drain on our culture. Sure, it’s attractive. Sure, it’s addictive. But so are dangerous drugs. Don’t get hooked.
Segway
This sad, futuristic means of transportation is stupid, and really annoying if you’re trying to get around like a normal pedestrian.
Furby
This I just don’t understand. In fact, isn’t it a little creepy?
Ford Pinto
This car notoriously shot up in flames when rear-ended. It was a complete disaster for everybody involved. Never should have happened.
Online Poker
As in in-person poker wasn’t dangerous enough to your finances , family, and mental well-being, now the popularity of online poker take take up your time and energy. Now you can lose what you worked for while you sit in the comfort of your home.
