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5 ‘Unmanly’ Things It’s Okay For Guys To Do In Their 30s

Whoever says turning 30 isn’t a big deal is full of it. Turning 30 is a big deal. Your hair doesn’t automatically fall out, you aren’t automatically decrepit and you won’t really notice feeling any different than before the big 3-o hit. But it’s a big deal.

There are some general things to do for anyone turning 30, like starting retirement planning if you haven’t already or doing everything possible to improve your credit score. You know, it’s basically time to be an adult.

But for some guys, there are going to be some mental hurdles they need to overcome that apply only to them. Despite the gradual demasculinization of the American man—if you believe everything you hear—there are still areas where men are expected to conform to gender norms and societal pressures. Or something like that.

Pee Sitting Down

It’s time to let go of the bravado that comes only from guys who are too masculine to pee any way other than standing. We’re starting off big here.

graphic of men standing and sitting to pee

Here’s why it is okay to pee sitting down:

  1. It’s more sanitary (at least at home). No standing = no missing = no urine splattering anywhere.
  2. It empties your bladder more completely, providing genuine relief.
  3. It might benefit your sex life.
  4. It’s one more excuse to sit down, and sitting down to pee frees up two hands for using your phone, just like when you’re dropping a twosie.
  5. It will put your female friends at ease by not fearing a fall into a toilet because the seat is up.
  6. It’s better for prostate heath (reducing the likelihood of prostate cancer).

So, why is this more acceptable at 30 than earlier in life? It isn’t really more acceptable. More guys should probably be doing it anyway. But at 30, we have to embrace our mortality a little bit, and if we can reduce our likelihood of developing prostate cancer then we should do it. The rest is all just gravy.

Ask For Help

This one may arrive early for some people, and others will probably fight it for a very long time.

Help Scrabble
By: Jeff Djevdet

It is okay to ask for help. At first you might just ask for help from a buddy to lift something heavy. It happens, you know? At 30 we better understand that we only have one body, and we begin to treat it a little bit better.

Okay, so we stop lifting heavy things. What else? In your 30s it is perfectly okay to ask for help with emotional things too. Maybe you’re trying to get over a pretty bad breakup, or you just lost a parent too early. Guys in their 20s might not want to show emotion, but once you hit 30 that’s all perfectly okay. You’ve lived long enough to know that real men have things called feelings.

But asking for help is so much more. It’s the beginning of an understanding that we are fallible humans with limitations, and other people in our lives can help fill in the gaps left by those limitations. This will make you a better friend, husband, employee and a better person in general.

I didn’t wait to learn this lesson until I was 30, and it’s been the most important lesson I’ve learned since kindergarten (when I learned that most people are assholes).

Watch What You Eat

If you’re one of those incredibly healthy people who thinks of food in terms of nutrition only already—instead of something to savor and enjoy—and you workout at least 5 days a week, then you can probably skip this section. The rest of us? Nope.

Image: OhMyVeggies

I’m 30, and I just recently went to the doctor for a checkup and such. Well, we got to talking about how the average male’s life expectancy increases after the age of 60. This surprised me, and considering I’m already halfway there it got me thinking about my life expectancy. Right now, at 30, my life expectancy is lower than my 63 year old father’s. I may not die before my father, but I’m mathematically more likely to die younger than he is. That’s frightening.

Heart disease kills a lot of men in their 40s and 50s. It’s right up there with cancer, and we have (arguably) less control over dying from cancer than we do of heart disease related illnesses. Getting fat, even a little fat, is not healthy, and the easiest way to fix that is to eat smarter. You may sound silly for ordering a salad with oil & vinegar on the side instead of wings and nachos, but just remember that it is adding years to your life every time you do.

Use Facial Moisturizer

Now that we’ve reminded you that you’re mortal, it’s also time to remind you that you begin looking mortal in your 30s. And looks are important.

man looking in mirror touching his face
Image: Nivea

Part of this applies to the last slide. If looks are important and society’s ideal body isn’t overweight, watching what you eat is key. In fact, did you know that overweight people are more likely to be unemployed? It’s true. It’s also true that if you were to become unemployed the chances are high you’d remain unemployed longer than a person younger than you would.

Older and overweight? Double whammy. So why the talk about moisturizer? During job interviews, a hiring manager is not allowed to ask you how old you are. If you look 40, then the hiring manager is going to assume you’re 40. If you look 25, the hiring manager is going to think you’re 25, all assuming something on your résumé or application doesn’t give away your real age. Using a face moisturizer will help hold off the appearance of wrinkles, and holding off the appearance of wrinkles is the best way to look younger. Even if you don’t think you need to moisturize/fight wrinkles yet, you do need to moisturize and fight wrinkles. It isn’t an overnight process, and it’s about prevention as much as treatment of the problem.

It’s not common for 30 years to not be hired for being too old, but starting to moisturize at 30 will keep you looking younger than you are from that point forward, which means this little change will benefit you when you’re 40, or 50, or… You get the point.

But the benefits don’t stop with being more hirable and preventing wrinkles, there is also a health bonus to using a face moisturizer. Almost all of the good ones come with UV protection, and UV protection will further protect you from wrinkles; it will also help you prevent cancer causing sun damage to your skin. This, too, is good.

To Commit

You’re over 30. You’re mortal. If you want to find someone to spend a very long time with then it’s time to stop chasing girls or guys at the bar and settle down.

man proposing to woman on water in chicago
Image: David Wittig

Trade Tinder for Date seriously, value things more than sex or physical attractiveness—which don’t last anyway—and open yourself to the opportunity to find real love. Sappy? Of course, but nobody wants to be a single 45 year old guy who still goes to a bar every Saturday night hoping to get lucky. It’s sad.

Hopefully your life is long, and it’s so much better to share that time with someone who makes it more enjoyable than it is to spend it alone. Don’t bank on your guy friends to be hanging around with you forever. Things change, and they’re going to settle down sooner or later. You should too.


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