There’s always one in every family or friend group. Whether it’s because they have a near-Zen apathy towards material possessions or they love stuff so much they already have everything, the result is the same: they’re Impossible To Shop For, what I’ll call the ITSF. Chances are you’ve thrown up your hands and given your ITSF cash or lottery tickets on at least one occasion. But with a bit of consideration and luck, you can find that perfect gift.
Give an event
For the person who has everything, spending time instead of money can be the way to go. If you have the means, spending both can be a good option with things like concerts, author book readings, sporting events, stand-up shows, fancy restaurants, and more. But it doesn’t have to be a big to-do. Maybe it’s promising to go fishing one-on-one, planning a small road trip together, or getting a group together for laser tag.
This is a gift that shouldn’t be a surprise unless you are positive that whatever you’re promising is something this person will love and have time for. The element of surprise in this situation is a lot less important than the time and consideration you’re giving.
Gift cards to somewhere new
Some people love gift cards to Amazon or Chili’s, but if that were the case for your ITSF you’d have figured it out by now. It’s a touch risky, but instead of giving them a gift card to somewhere they shop, choose somewhere new that they’d probably enjoy. If you think about it, you know that place. The one that whenever you pass it the ITSF says, “Oh! We should go there sometime,” and then you never do.
It’s a way to provide a new experience to someone without the pressure of saying when and with whom it should occur. Sure the gift card can be for a restaurant or a store, but it can also be for a spa, a winery, a paintball place, or a paint-your-own-pottery place. This one is especially good for the ITSF who likes the process of planning and is open to trying different things.
Charity honor donations
For the ITSF who doesn’t like stuff and rarely has free time, a charity donation in their honor is a thoughtful way to show that you care about what they care about. There are charities for veterans, endangered species, homelessness, children’s illnesses, the environment, and more. It can feel strange to essentially say, “I gave money to someone else because I think you’d like it,” but for the right person it can be a meaningful gift. It’s especially effective if the charity you choose provides a nominal gift like a card, ornament, or stuffed toy so you have something physical to give, too.
Keep in mind that not all charities are created equal, and it’s a good idea to check ratings on Charity Navigator, which is itself a non-profit in need of donations. Also, if your ITSF has dramatically different view than yours, this kind of gift can be a minefield.
That thing they didn’t know they wanted
I know this is the holy grail of gifts for the ITSF, but you’re better off requesting a wishlist and buying off of that. Following the siren song of the amazing, unexpected gift can have satisfying results, like when I gave my mother her first designer purse. But it also led me to believe that my father wanted a Squatty Potty, which confused everyone, especially since Amazon included someone else’s gift message.
If you must tread down this treacherous road of gift giving don’t stray too far from the ITSF’s interests. Every hobby has that wonderful, but not necessary item: Cricut for scrapbookers, stand mixers for bakers, aerators for wine enthusiasts, etc. These items are usually hard to find or expensive, or else the ITSF would already have them.
I am not a proponent of DIY because it’s far too easy to spend hours making garbage. But for those with sufficient skill a personalized piece of art, hand-made clothing, or a short compilation of home videos can be some of the best gifts ever given. For those without these skills, a card and some cash would be better received.
