Sometimes the phrase “new beginnings” makes me want to barf a little. It has become this phrase overused by women who have recently broken up with some average guy and are now planning trips to hike the PCT and buy themselves flowers and take their own damn selves out on dates.
Essentially, by me. It’s been overused by me.
Whatever, though. Because remember that article I wrote about giving up on dating because all these men had annoyed me too much this year? Yeah. Needless to say, I didn’t take my own advice. I gave it another shot, and, as it happens for most twenty-somethings who didn’t meet their significant other at a private christian college, I was disappointed again. Disappointed and single. Double win.
But don’t underestimate my ability to take a seasonal change such as spring as a metaphor for the season in life I find myself in currently. So for all the eye rolls and laughs that “new beginnings” receives (even by me), I think if I am choosing to see it as a positive thing in my life, then I actually kind of win, right?
New beginnings are available to us all the time. We get Mondays, New Year’s Day, new jobs, new relationships, new candles, coffee cups, friends… we don’t need to wait for an arbitrary timeline to feel like we can finally get that fresh start we’ve been dying for. Time is relative, it’s what we do with it that makes a difference.
That being said, you might be finding yourself in a similar place as me today. You might be ending some season in your life (whether it be a relationship, job, friendship, etc.) and you might be feeling kind of scared about it. Leaving something that was once comfortable to you is hard, and definitely frightening, but it could also be the best thing you can do.
A lot of times we are just stuck in our comfort zones. We don’t know how we would react to dating again, to working somewhere new, to living in a new city. We don’t know how we would cope because it’s uncharted territory. Or maybe we’ve been somewhere similar before and it hurt us, so now we are afraid to be in that place again. Regardless, the feeling of comfort keeps us where we are, rather than moving forward into the adventure of the unknown.
If you’re like me, you tend to choose comfort. Every time. But here’s the thing about choosing comfort: choosing comfort means choosing what you already know and are familiar with. And if we are honest with ourselves, most of us aren’t happy with what we are familiar with at this point in our lives. We yearn for adventure and something better, but we are too scared to take that step onto a path that we didn’t pave ourselves. No, instead we settle, because how are we to know if something better is actually out there?
Well, I don’t know. Maybe we won’t know unless we try. I’m certainly no expert on doing things super successfully or not screwing up. And I am certainly no expert on adventure and leaving comfort in the dust. Like I said, I tend to choose comfort. I choose the solitude of my apartment and the friends I’ve loved for years. I choose guys I’ve dated previously (because dating is terrifying) and I tend to take my coffee black because, like, what if I don’t like the way they make their lattes?
But, it’s March. Spring started yesterday. I wore a sundress and got iced sweet tea and I feel pretty damn good sitting in the sun and coming up with all these new possibilities that I could do in this life, without being tied down to something that didn’t make me glow the way sweet tea and my cat do.
So I encourage you to cope the way the season is. Gently roll into the next season in your life with some warmth and regrowth. Spring is just as good a time as any.
